Addicts do not exist in a vacuum, and many people with serious drug and alcohol addictions are married and have children. Sex addicts are frequently married, and may have left a shattered relationship behind them by the time they agree to rehab. If the person you love is an addict of any kind, then you are facing a hard road that may not always be pleasant. There are several things that you need to do in order to live comfortably with the addict, and to help them recover if they decide to try holistic rehabilitation.
Often, living with an addict can feel as though you have to give up your own life in order to help them recover. You may be told that you have to accept that your life will not always be completely under your control, or that you are co-dependent on the addict. What most programs will not tell you is that you need to pay more attention to looking after yourself first. The first step you will need is to set boundaries. This means restricting what can and cannot happen in a particular place, or at a particular time. Learn in particular to say ‘no’, and to say ‘yes’, and to mean both. If you wish to, you may choose to go to counselling yourself, but you may also benefit from Yoga, from spiritual therapy, and from alternative treatments designed to help you relax and to ease stress.
You don’t have to stop wanting to help your addict while you are caring for yourself, and many people have positive experiences while helping their loved ones. What is important is that you should not push the addict into doing private rehab, or try to force them to change. If your addict wants to continue taking drugs, or drinking alcohol, then getting rid of these substances simply creates tension.
Another common mistake that family members make is to become the ‘guardians’ of the addictive substances. This places the responsibility for the addiction out of the addict’s hands, and also makes you participate in the addiction. You are not your loved one’s policeman, and you can’t take control of their addiction.
If you really want to help your addict, then you should look into luxury rehabilitation together. Find a holistic rehabilitation clinic that is able to help you both, or that offers sympathy and support to others, and can teach you how to help your addict in daily life.